Why I Like Jeff Garcia But Want To See The Snot Knocked Out Of Him

When the 49ers unwisely turned their back on Jeff Garcia, I got this ache in the pit of my stomach.

It's because I knew infamy would soon envelop this star-crossed side of the bay, where civilization can still be found.

And five Lombardis.

Compared to a pathetic 3-1 from that that grimy, crime-infested blight called Oakland.

Compared to the pathetic loser fans—whom I call Raiderettes, who keep pulling out their lousy AFL title.

It wasn't the Super Bowl.

It don't mean crap.

So stop bringing it up.